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transformers: morons in disguise


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to rotor- amen... lol

 

to sharkticonqueen- Rodimus still has no quirk yet. none of his team really does either. i might reuse some of my old ones. rodimus will slap his teamates when they disobey him. Prowl lacks attention skills, and Landmine seems to be the only sane one....

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Verticon: *speaks thru his walkie-talkie* Verticon to base. The ship has just arrived. Stand by to steal it.

 

Avalanche: roger that. We’ll commence the plan immediately. Alright guys, remember what you were supposed to do?

*The other bots say yes*

Wedge: *goes outside* HEY GUYS! CAN I…… UH…. BORROW YOUR SHIP THINGY?!

Captain: uhhh…sure. Just remember to bring it back….

Wedge: OKEY DOKEY!

Avalanche: ok. That works too…. *radios Verticon* ok. Wedge just got the ship for us. Get your ass over here!

Verticon: good lord that’s eerie…. Well. I’m on my way. *Breaks door down* HOOOONK! HONK! HONK!

Bongimus: IF YOU DO THAT ONE MORE TIME, I’LL RIP YOUR ARMS OFF!!!

Verticon: you really need to have fun, man. Who’s gonna drive this thing?

Avalanche: first, we all need to shrink ourselves to human size. Otherwise we’ll sink the ship… *shrinks everyone*

Verticon: but still. Who’s gonna pilot it?

Wedge: OO! OO! OO! ME! ME! ME!

Bongimus: let me think about that. No

Wedge: I HATE YOU! I’M NEVER TALKING TO YOU AGAIN!

Bongimus: THANK YOU, LORD!!!

Wedge: LET’S BE FRIENDS!

Bongimus: dammit…..

Avalanche: I’m gonna put this AI into the ship too. *Installs AI*

Wedge: l-l-let me guess. It’s like a GI. Only better!

Avalanche: what’s a GI?

Wedge: you know! GI Joe! DUH!!!…LOOTH! DULUTH! Get it? HAHAHAHAAA!!

Bongimus: grrrr… *hits Wedge in the head*

Columbia Star: wha? Huh? Where am I?

Avalanche: ah excellent! It works!

Columbia Star: the hell it does! Now get me some meat and a pole! I need… to FISH!

Verticon: NO FISH FOR YOU! *Slaps Columbia Star on the handrail*

Columbia Star: OW!!

 

Avalanche and Verticon: *at the front of the ship with beer mugs*

We're whalers on the moon. We carry our harpoons. But there ain't no whales so we tell tall tales and sing this whaling tune!!!!

Columbia Star: good idea! Let’s go find a whale!

Verticon: there aren’t any whales in lake Superior! Wait until we get to the ocean.

Avalanche: I plan on installing AI’s into every ship that ever visits Duluth via a hidden installation grid in the canal!

Verticon: ooo. So they’ll greet me in words instead of a horn when they pass beneath me?

Avalanche: I guess.

Verticon: SWEET! Pass me some ink balloons! I’m gonna mess up some decks!

Columbia Star: AUGH!

 

 

Columbia Star: I’m bored. Who wants to go fishing?

Bongimus: I’m in a surprisingly good mood today. Throw me your anchor once. WAIT! Never mind that. I don’t need the whole deck collapsing from it. *Carefully puts meat on the anchor* there. Now drop it. Some fish will come and eat it.

*3 ships approach from all directions*

Mesabi Miner: HEY HEY HEY!!!

Indiana Harbor: this AI is great.

Alpena: YO WASSUP!!!

Captain Saltybeard: SILENCE, YE! I be rammin’ that ship there! Hold ye steady…

Alpena: do I have to?

Captain Saltybeard: NO DINNER FOR YE!

Crew member: why do you always say ye?

Captain Saltybeard: uh… YO HO HO AND A BOTTLE OF… SALTYBEARD!

Crew Member: uh… sure

Indiana Harbor: I hate commanding fellow ships, but. Just to let you know, Captain Saltybeard stole the Alpena and is trying to ram you. If I were you, I’d escape…

Columbia Star: you don’t need to tell me twice. I’M OUT OF HERE! *Accelerates and leaves the ram zone*

Mesabi Miner: we’ll keep him busy… *rams the Alpena*

Alpena: AUGH! HEY! WHAT DID I EVER DO TO YOU?!?!

 

Inferno: wait a minute. 2 squadrons approaching from either direction have just appeared on radar, sir

Optimus: THE PUTTIES ARE HERE!!!!! IT’S MORPHIN TIME!!

Hot Shot: What’s a “putty�?

Inferno: don’t ask…

Wheelie: *to Optimus* I have one thing to say. You, Sir, are gay!

Wreck Gar: is your child protected for the future? Gerber, the baby people you’ve known since you were a baby-

Jetfire: no I didn’t. In fact. I only knew about them a few seconds ago. *Fart* ‘scuse me

*Rodimus’s ship lands and the 3 of them get out*

Landmine: WE COME IN PEACE!

*SLAP!!!*

Rodimus: I say the cool stuff!

Prowl: we finally found it! Ocean city!

Rodimus: does this planet need saving?

Optimus: only when lord Zedd attacks.

Hot Shot: *ahem* don’t mind Optimus. He’s an idiot.

Rodimus: I see…

Grimlock: ME GRIMLOCK NO LIKE YOU!

Hot Rod: Megatron almost never invades here, Optimus. Has he surrendered?

Optimus: I doubt it. Megatron just takes a while to plot his next attack.

Rodimus: we only came here to let you know that we’re patrolling the space around Earth now. That is all. Goodbye, Optimus Prime.

Prowl: thank you thank you. We’ll be here till Tuesday!

*SLAP!!*

Rodimus: BAD! I said the last word! No talking!

*The Rodimus gang takes off and flies away*

Optimus: but he just got here…

Ironhide: you scared him, sir

Inferno: DECEPTICONS AT 4 O’CLOCK!!!!

Megatron: MWA HAHAHAHAHAAA!!!!! WHERE AM I?!?! YOU CANNOT SEE ME BECAUSE I’M INVISIBLE!!! HAHAHAAAA!!!!

Hot Shot: you’re right in front of me…

Megatron: POONUTS! Grr.. Lucky guess….

Optimus: MEGATRON!

Megatron: THIS ENDS HERE, OPTIMUS PRIME!

Optimus: one shall stand, one shall fall…. Unless we both fall.. Or both survive…but one of those shall definitely happen today.

Inferno: HA! I listen to radiofree Cybertron too! That was a great parody.

Optimus: I MADE IT UP!

Inferno: no you didn’t. Radiofree Cybertron said it in their transformers: the movie parody

Optimus: *sob*

Blurr: I’M-READY-TO-FIGHT. I’LL-KICK-SOME-ASS. YOU’RE-REALLY-SCREWED-NOW!! I’LL-KICK-YOUR-ASS!! HAHAHA!!

Scorponok: hand over the energon or we’ll destroy you all…. After I CLAIM THIS LAND IN THE NAME OF THE CAIMEN ISLANDS! *Sticks a flag in the ground*

Starscream: those are actual elder transformers!

Kup: I’M NOT OLD, I’M BIG-BONED!

Hot Rod: I’m probably smarter than you!

Megatron: uh…. I’m over here…wait.. MY INVISIBILITY WORKS!!!

Jetfire: *fart* s’cuse me. *Ahem* no it doesn’t. Hot Rod’s an idiot…

Megatron: POONUTS POONUTS POONUTS!!!!

Demolishor: I’m just itching for some action here!

Tidal Wave: Kicker….come to Tidal Wave!

Kicker: uhh…. TAKE MISHA!

Misha: HEY!

 

Landmine: I don’t think he’s ever coming down from there…oh. He is? Well. I doubt it. Ohhh… you have a good point there…

Prowl: Who the hell are you talking to? You’re schizophrenic and so are you!

Landmine: I am not!

 

Alpha-Q: what is the stsatus on our mission? SCORPONOK HAS ARRIVED AT OCEAN CITY AND HAS BEGUN THE EXTRACTION....I HOPE! WHAT ABOUT MY PIZZA?!?!!?THAT IS NOT IMPORTANT!!!YES IT IS!!!!THE MAIN PRITORITY IS GETTING ENERGON!!! NO IT ISNT! WE MUST GET PIZZA!!! LOTS OF IT!!! LET'S HAVE A BARBECUE!!!!DON'T MAKE ME COME OVER THERE AND RIP THAT DAMN MOUSTACHE OFF OF YOU!!!stop fighting... i cant concentrate...

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  • 2 weeks later...

Dude after reading this story over and over it is still the funniest one around. As for Jetstorm what does he know. BAH!!! Rodimus is both schyzo and a lost comedian. He just doesn't know it. :lol :lol :lol :lol :lol

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actually Landmine's the schizo. Rodimus is like thrust. he slaps anyone who annoys him even in the slightest way. plus he;s always pondering the "great thoughts" which usually are nothing more than what he did the previous night

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Okay, try this then---have Rodimus a brave Warrior by day but by night an Elvis inpersonator. Just about everyone will be :note all shucked up :note :lol :lol :lol :lol :lol

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elvis impersonation sounds good. but it will get old. and i dont know enough about elvis. but you gave me an idea. every night, during a full moon, Rodimus' thrid transformation automatically activates. he becomes Slapimus! kinda like a werewolf. he has no choice. he MUST transform. lol he goes around space. slapping anyone he sees. then he says something nutty. lol. the irony is since he;s in space, he's always near a full moon. so he can always see it.

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