Name: Decepticharge

Faction: Decepticonish

Function: Ass-imilator

 

Ghey repaint lust is in the eye of the beholder

 

Decepticharge is shown as one of histories most notorious Decepticons. The fact that he came online following the BOT episode and died before the movie, reveals his deathwish nature. (either that or he just sucked donkey balls) His self characterization can be summed up like this, "completists will buy any remold reguardless of how lame they are". His armament consist of a hardtop shield made from .22 gauge steel and able to repel most rain waters. His gun is actually lamer than the shield so he doesn't bother using it.

 

Decepticharges ONLY known weakness is the fact that he has no strengths, skills or abilities.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

[Ed McMahon]HIOOOOOO!! YES!!! WE HAVE A WINNAH!!!!![/Ed McMahon]

"completists will buy any remold reguardless of how lame they are"

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Please memorize the above sentence. Thank you.

Decepticon Decepticharge

"Would you like to Supersize your order-OF DEATH!?"

Function cashier

 

-bio

Becuse of his PHD in Consumer Mathmatics Subjct feels that he is the moast qualafied to lead the decepticons. Subject feels a strong need to deceptivly overcharg on all items Autobots and ocasionaly fellow Decepticons who buy from his checkout. Subject employs lethal force in aprahending Shoplifters.

-Abilities

Decepticharge's barcode scanner is able to price an object from a distance of 50 Kilometers away. He has memorized any and all store polocies, Decepticharge is highly skilled in the field of consumer Mathmatics.

-Weaknes.

Ocasionaly Decepticharge will mistakenly forget to charge regulor price when his decepticon superiors are buying grocceries.

Decepticon Decepticharge

"Would you like to Supersize your order-OF DEATH!?"

Function cashier

 

-bio

Becuse of his PHD in Consumer Mathmatics Subjct feels that he is the moast qualafied to lead the decepticons. Subject feels a strong need to deceptivly overcharg on all items Autobots and ocasionaly fellow Decepticons who buy from his checkout. Subject employs lethal force in aprahending Shoplifters.

-Abilities

Decepticharge's barcode scanner is able to price an object from a distance of 50 Kilometers away. He has memorized any and all store polocies, Decepticharge is highly skilled in the field of consumer Mathmatics.

-Weaknes.

Ocasionaly Decepticharge will mistakenly forget to charge regulor price when his decepticon superiors are buying grocceries.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

This made my day. :thumb

Decepticharge

 

Faction-Decepticons

 

Function:  Wal-Mart Greeter

 

Quote:  "Welcome to Wal-Mart!  Do you need a cart today?  Do you have any returns?  Here's a flyer with today's specials!"

 

Shortly after the BT incident Megatron, mighty but sometimes short-sighted leader of the Decepticons, realized that to conquer Earth and control its resources he would need more human help.  Thus through various techniques of mind control, intimidation and insider trading, the Decepticons, through their human allies, carried out hostile takeovers of many American corporations including that bastion of greed, Wal-Mart.  (Halliburton was too strong even for Megatron.)  Soon Megatron decided he would need to place troops to protect his new assets, and Decepticharge was chosen for this all-important task.  Having no real skills to speak of, and lacking in firepower, strength, and personality, Decepticharge was absolutely perfect for the task.  Equipped with a version of the Autobots' GT system Decepticharge and thousands of his copies were deployed to every Wal-Mart in America, where they keep vigilant watch over their massed amounts of discount merchandise and weed out Autobot sympathizers before they can take advantage of low, low prices.

 

Decepticharge is equipeed with a sticker gun for labeling items to be returned; he can fire off over half a million stickers before reloading, which comes in handy during the holiday rush.  His sensors can recognise all known Autobots' human agents and mark them for pickup by Wal-Mart security, so they can be effectively neutralized through false shoplifting charges.  He does not actually have a shield; his car-mode hardtop had to go somewhere and he could never figure out how to fold the thing up, thus he either carries it around or sets it aside at the door.  One of his great advantages is speed.  He can patrol the lot and bring in over 500 carts in less than three minutes.  And, with his built-in floor polisher (available for use only in car mode) he can wax every floor in the store in half an hour.  And best of all, since he lives in the parking lot in car mode and has no biological systems, he has no need for a paycheck or health care.  All he requires is some Energon, and all Wal-Marts have a ration dispenser hidden in the warehouse.  Indeed, in the eyes of Wal-Mart Decepticharge is the perfect employee.

Decepticharge

 

Faction-Decepticons

 

Function:  Wal-Mart Greeter

 

Quote:  "Welcome to Wal-Mart!  Do you need a cart today?  Do you have any returns?  Here's a flyer with today's specials!"

 

Shortly after the BT incident Megatron, mighty but sometimes short-sighted leader of the Decepticons, realized that to conquer Earth and control its resources he would need more human help.  Thus through various techniques of mind control, intimidation and insider trading, the Decepticons, through their human allies, carried out hostile takeovers of many American corporations including that bastion of greed, Wal-Mart.  (Halliburton was too strong even for Megatron.)  Soon Megatron decided he would need to place troops to protect his new assets, and Decepticharge was chosen for this all-important task.  Having no real skills to speak of, and lacking in firepower, strength, and personality, Decepticharge was absolutely perfect for the task.  Equipped with a version of the Autobots' GT system Decepticharge and thousands of his copies were deployed to every Wal-Mart in America, where they keep vigilant watch over their massed amounts of discount merchandise and weed out Autobot sympathizers before they can take advantage of low, low prices.

 

Decepticharge is equipeed with a sticker gun for labeling items to be returned; he can fire off over half a million stickers before reloading, which comes in handy during the holiday rush.  His sensors can recognise all known Autobots' human agents and mark them for pickup by Wal-Mart security, so they can be effectively neutralized through false shoplifting charges.  He does not actually have a shield; his car-mode hardtop had to go somewhere and he could never figure out how to fold the thing up, thus he either carries it around or sets it aside at the door.  One of his great advantages is speed.  He can patrol the lot and bring in over 500 carts in less than three minutes.  And, with his built-in floor polisher (available for use only in car mode) he can wax every floor in the store in half an hour.  And best of all, since he lives in the parking lot in car mode and has no biological systems, he has no need for a paycheck or health care.  All he requires is some Energon, and all Wal-Marts have a ration dispenser hidden in the warehouse.  Indeed, in the eyes of Wal-Mart Decepticharge is the perfect employee.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

 

:rofl

 

That was very good.

How is he with the kids? Does he have those  :) stickers.

Decepticharge

 

Faction: Accounts Recievable (3rd floor)

 

"Has anyone seen Steve, he didn't show up today?"

 

Decepticharge is a certified public accountant, but just barely. He isn't particularly good at anything, so naturally he made his way in to middle management with his exceptional skills at brown-tonguing and general ass-hattery. He believes that he rules his office suite with an iron fist, but everyone else ignores him like the tool he is. He is very superficial and tries to impress people with his technological gadgets. His alternate mode is that of a suped up ricer. Needless to say he's never driven faster than 65mph. He also carries the top to his car since the modifications required to make that a part of his transformation are to expensive, even for him. Hell, he's having enough trouble dealing with the uncomfortable and awkward spoiler he just HAD to have. He also carries the overly complicated remote control to his entertainment center. He feels that if it is left unattended, someone is bound to Powerglide up his settings and he'd never be able to fix them.

 

Abilities: Getting a good job without having to resort to work.

 

Weaknesses: Subject is not particularly strong. Or smart. Poor endurance as well. Oh, yeah. He doesn't have a gun. Okay, start over. Subject has no known use. That sounds a little better I guess.

Sorry, double post.

Decepticharge

 

Faction: Accounts Recievable (3rd floor)

 

"Has anyone seen Steve, he didn't show up today?"

 

Decepticharge is a certified public accountant, but just barely. He isn't particularly good at anything, so naturally he made his way in to middle management with his exceptional skills at brown-tonguing and general ass-hattery. He believes that he rules his office suite with an iron fist, but everyone else ignores him like the tool he is. He is very superficial and tries to impress people with his technological gadgets. His alternate mode is that of a suped up ricer. Needless to say he's never driven faster than 65mph. He also carries the top to his car since the modifications required to make that a part of his transformation are to expensive, even for him. Hell, he's having enough trouble dealing with the uncomfortable and awkward spoiler he just HAD to have. He also carries the overly complicated remote control to his entertainment center. He feels that if it is left unattended, someone is bound to Powerglide up his settings and he'd never be able to fix them.

 

Abilities: Getting a good job without having to resort to work.

 

Weaknesses: Subject is not particularly strong. Or smart. Poor endurance as well. Oh, yeah. He doesn't have a gun. Okay, start over. Subject has no known use. That sounds a little better I guess.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

 

 

Dude.  That's awesome!! :thumb