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ROSEDOGGYDOG
Sep 11 2008, 08:14 AM
ihi fo sho!

22-Year-Old Auctions Off Virginity to Pay for College

QUOTE
Going once....
A Sacramento State grad is putting her virginity on the auction block to help pay for her studies.

"I don't think auctioning my virginity will solve all my problems, but it will create some financial stability," the 22-year-old (who uses the pseudonym "Natalie Dylan") says on tonight's The Insider. "I'm ready for the controversy ... I'm ready to do this."

See famous celeb virgins.

Dylan says she's already taken a polygraph test to prove her virginal status and is also willing to undergo a medical exam.

She says she hopes to net up to a million dollars from the auction, which will take place in Nevada at the infamous Moonlight Bunny Ranch (eBay turned her down).

"Through this process I'm not just looking for the highest bidder," she says, adding, "I'm looking for someone who is a genuine, overall nice person."

Howard Stern has denied a report that he is affiliated with the auction.

DarkNarcoleptic
Sep 11 2008, 08:34 AM
Sounds like a solid plan. What could go wrong?
Lord Madhammer
Sep 11 2008, 08:35 AM
QUOTE (( . Y . ) @ Sep 11 2008, 11:34 AM) *
Sounds like a solid plan. What could go wrong?

optimuslaugh2.gif seriously
Jerrod
Sep 11 2008, 08:39 AM
QUOTE (Lord Madhammer @ Sep 11 2008, 11:35 AM) *
QUOTE (( . Y . ) @ Sep 11 2008, 11:34 AM) *
Sounds like a solid plan. What could go wrong?

optimuslaugh2.gif seriously

About a year ago there was supposed to be a porno movie where a chick named "Katee Holmes" for real lost her virginity on camera. Sadly, I don't think anything ever, ahem, came of it.

*wanted to see it*
Haggisjin
Sep 11 2008, 08:40 AM
A 22yo college student that is still a virgin? I call ugmo.
Cool Hand Lube
Sep 11 2008, 08:40 AM
You guys sound sarcastic. It seems to me she's really put a lot of thought into her financial future.
Lord Madhammer
Sep 11 2008, 08:42 AM
QUOTE (Jerrod @ Sep 11 2008, 11:39 AM) *
QUOTE (Lord Madhammer @ Sep 11 2008, 11:35 AM) *
QUOTE (( . Y . ) @ Sep 11 2008, 11:34 AM) *
Sounds like a solid plan. What could go wrong?

optimuslaugh2.gif seriously

About a year ago there was supposed to be a porno movie where a chick named "Katee Holmes" for real lost her virginity on camera. Sadly, I don't think anything ever, ahem, came of it.

*wanted to see it*

the first time is never all that great
ROSEDOGGYDOG
Sep 11 2008, 08:43 AM
"I've never done this before..."
*as she ties hair back, pops neck and jaw*
Stormtrooper53
Sep 11 2008, 08:44 AM
QUOTE (Lord Madhammer @ Sep 11 2008, 11:42 AM) *
the first time is never all that great

Speak f'yer self, hoss.
ROSEDOGGYDOG
Sep 11 2008, 08:44 AM
QUOTE (Lord Madhammer @ Sep 11 2008, 09:42 AM) *
QUOTE (Jerrod @ Sep 11 2008, 11:39 AM) *
QUOTE (Lord Madhammer @ Sep 11 2008, 11:35 AM) *
QUOTE (( . Y . ) @ Sep 11 2008, 11:34 AM) *
Sounds like a solid plan. What could go wrong?

optimuslaugh2.gif seriously

About a year ago there was supposed to be a porno movie where a chick named "Katee Holmes" for real lost her virginity on camera. Sadly, I don't think anything ever, ahem, came of it.

*wanted to see it*

the first time is never all that great


the first timers on video who regret it and are crying through process totally kill the moment
Jerrod
Sep 11 2008, 08:44 AM
QUOTE (Lord Madhammer @ Sep 11 2008, 11:42 AM) *
QUOTE (Jerrod @ Sep 11 2008, 11:39 AM) *
QUOTE (Lord Madhammer @ Sep 11 2008, 11:35 AM) *
QUOTE (( . Y . ) @ Sep 11 2008, 11:34 AM) *
Sounds like a solid plan. What could go wrong?

optimuslaugh2.gif seriously

About a year ago there was supposed to be a porno movie where a chick named "Katee Holmes" for real lost her virginity on camera. Sadly, I don't think anything ever, ahem, came of it.

*wanted to see it*

the first time is never all that great

Been there. But I'm horribly jaded when it comes to porn, so its either that or midgets strangling one another.
ROSEDOGGYDOG
Sep 11 2008, 08:45 AM
rofl.gif
Cool Hand Lube
Sep 11 2008, 08:54 AM
QUOTE (Jerrod @ Sep 11 2008, 09:44 AM) *
Been there. But I'm horribly jaded when it comes to porn, so its either that or midgets strangling one another.


You have that DVD too?
Hunter Rose
Sep 11 2008, 09:13 AM
QUOTE (ROSEDOGGYDOG @ Sep 11 2008, 09:44 AM) *
the first timers on video who regret it and are crying through process totally kill the moment

What are you talking about? That's the best part (well that and the midgets)
is probably the only person on the forum who has legitimately lost his virginity twice
Cool Hand Lube
Sep 11 2008, 09:15 AM
All I'm gonna say is this:

"Amateur Amputee Midget Sex Camp: Vol XXVIII"

It will change your world.
DarkNarcoleptic
Sep 11 2008, 09:15 AM
QUOTE (Hunter Rose @ Sep 11 2008, 12:13 PM) *
QUOTE (ROSEDOGGYDOG @ Sep 11 2008, 09:44 AM) *
the first timers on video who regret it and are crying through process totally kill the moment

What are you talking about? That's the best part (well that and the midgets)
is probably the only person on the forum who has legitimately lost his virginity twice

I had to think about it for a second
Jerrod
Sep 11 2008, 09:16 AM
QUOTE (Hunter Rose @ Sep 11 2008, 12:13 PM) *
is probably the only person on the forum who has legitimately lost his virginity twice

Lucky!
Cool Hand Lube
Sep 11 2008, 09:17 AM
QUOTE (Jerrod @ Sep 11 2008, 10:16 AM) *
QUOTE (Hunter Rose @ Sep 11 2008, 12:13 PM) *
is probably the only person on the forum who has legitimately lost his virginity twice

Lucky!


You can too, you know.
Jerrod
Sep 11 2008, 09:20 AM
QUOTE (Cool Hand Lube @ Sep 11 2008, 12:17 PM) *
QUOTE (Jerrod @ Sep 11 2008, 10:16 AM) *
QUOTE (Hunter Rose @ Sep 11 2008, 12:13 PM) *
is probably the only person on the forum who has legitimately lost his virginity twice

Lucky!


You can too, you know.

guh copy.gif
ROSEDOGGYDOG
Sep 11 2008, 09:45 AM
QUOTE (Jerrod @ Sep 11 2008, 10:20 AM) *
QUOTE (Cool Hand Lube @ Sep 11 2008, 12:17 PM) *
QUOTE (Jerrod @ Sep 11 2008, 10:16 AM) *
QUOTE (Hunter Rose @ Sep 11 2008, 12:13 PM) *
is probably the only person on the forum who has legitimately lost his virginity twice

Lucky!


You can too, you know.

guh copy.gif


Brings a whole new meaning to "pucker up" huh?
Cool Hand Lube
Sep 11 2008, 09:59 AM
"Here, bite down on this stick."
Lord Madhammer
Sep 11 2008, 11:18 AM
...and we're already at teh bsx.png

a new record, I think thumbsup1.gif
Cool Hand Lube
Sep 11 2008, 11:37 AM
We aim for efficiency!

bsx.png in less than 30 posts or your money back!
Hunter Rose
Sep 11 2008, 11:40 AM
QUOTE (Lord Madhammer @ Sep 11 2008, 12:18 PM) *
...and we're already at teh bsx.png

a new record, I think thumbsup1.gif

To be fair though - this thread started out about sex so the transition to bsx wasn't much of a jump.
Lord Madhammer
Sep 11 2008, 11:42 AM
QUOTE (Hunter Rose @ Sep 11 2008, 02:40 PM) *
QUOTE (Lord Madhammer @ Sep 11 2008, 12:18 PM) *
...and we're already at teh bsx.png

a new record, I think thumbsup1.gif

To be fair though - this thread started out about sex so the transition to bsx wasn't much of a jump.

To me, this thread was just a reminder to buy a chastity belt for my daughter.
Cool Hand Lube
Sep 11 2008, 11:44 AM
No kidding LM.

Have you ever heard the saying that "with a boy, you only have one d!ck to worry about, but with a girl, you have one million d!cks to worry about"?

I have 3 daughters BTW.
slugpitcher
Sep 11 2008, 11:47 AM
QUOTE (Cool Hand Lube @ Sep 11 2008, 03:44 PM) *
No kidding LM.

Have you ever heard the saying that "with a boy, you only have one d!ck to worry about, but with a girl, you have one million d!cks to worry about"?

leaving.gif
Lord Madhammer
Sep 11 2008, 11:48 AM
QUOTE (slugpitcher @ Sep 11 2008, 02:47 PM) *
QUOTE (Cool Hand Lube @ Sep 11 2008, 03:44 PM) *
No kidding LM.

Have you ever heard the saying that "with a boy, you only have one d!ck to worry about, but with a girl, you have one million d!cks to worry about"?

leaving.gif

I totally and completely fail to get your sig.

ETA: man, maybe I'm getting old but she looks like a child

http://www.usmagazine.com/files/virgin-b.jpg
Hunter Rose
Sep 11 2008, 11:53 AM
QUOTE (Lord Madhammer @ Sep 11 2008, 12:48 PM) *
QUOTE (slugpitcher @ Sep 11 2008, 02:47 PM) *
QUOTE (Cool Hand Lube @ Sep 11 2008, 03:44 PM) *
No kidding LM.

Have you ever heard the saying that "with a boy, you only have one d!ck to worry about, but with a girl, you have one million d!cks to worry about"?

leaving.gif

I totally and completely fail to get your sig.

ETA: man, maybe I'm getting old but she looks like a child

http://www.usmagazine.com/files/virgin-b.jpg

CLICK and Answers you will find!
Lord Madhammer
Sep 11 2008, 11:58 AM
QUOTE (Hunter Rose @ Sep 11 2008, 02:53 PM) *
QUOTE (Lord Madhammer @ Sep 11 2008, 12:48 PM) *
QUOTE (slugpitcher @ Sep 11 2008, 02:47 PM) *
QUOTE (Cool Hand Lube @ Sep 11 2008, 03:44 PM) *
No kidding LM.

Have you ever heard the saying that "with a boy, you only have one d!ck to worry about, but with a girl, you have one million d!cks to worry about"?

leaving.gif

I totally and completely fail to get your sig.

ETA: man, maybe I'm getting old but she looks like a child

http://www.usmagazine.com/files/virgin-b.jpg

CLICK and Answers you will find!

laugh I almost did
Asthaloth
Sep 11 2008, 12:06 PM
QUOTE (Lord Madhammer @ Sep 11 2008, 08:48 PM) *
QUOTE (slugpitcher @ Sep 11 2008, 02:47 PM) *
QUOTE (Cool Hand Lube @ Sep 11 2008, 03:44 PM) *
No kidding LM.

Have you ever heard the saying that "with a boy, you only have one d!ck to worry about, but with a girl, you have one million d!cks to worry about"?

leaving.gif

I totally and completely fail to get your sig.

ETA: man, maybe I'm getting old but she looks like a child

http://www.usmagazine.com/files/virgin-b.jpg



That is so obviously a photoshop.
Lord Madhammer
Sep 11 2008, 12:13 PM
QUOTE (Asthaloth @ Sep 11 2008, 03:06 PM) *
QUOTE (Lord Madhammer @ Sep 11 2008, 08:48 PM) *
QUOTE (slugpitcher @ Sep 11 2008, 02:47 PM) *
QUOTE (Cool Hand Lube @ Sep 11 2008, 03:44 PM) *
No kidding LM.

Have you ever heard the saying that "with a boy, you only have one d!ck to worry about, but with a girl, you have one million d!cks to worry about"?

leaving.gif

I totally and completely fail to get your sig.

ETA: man, maybe I'm getting old but she looks like a child

http://www.usmagazine.com/files/virgin-b.jpg



That is so obviously a photoshop.

Maybe she wears a bag over her head whenever she goes tanning.

and has scoliosis
Cool Hand Lube
Sep 11 2008, 12:13 PM
QUOTE (Lord Madhammer @ Sep 11 2008, 12:48 PM) *
ETA: man, maybe I'm getting old but she looks like a child

http://www.usmagazine.com/files/virgin-b.jpg



She does look pretty young, but I would still nail her if half her high school football team already hadn't. I mean c'mon, no one even date raped this chick? What a waste...

UPDATE: The other pic has been discovered to be a fake, while a real picture of the 22 year-old in question has been obtained by USA Today, and can be found HERE.
G.A.S.H.
Sep 11 2008, 12:17 PM
QUOTE (Lord Madhammer @ Sep 11 2008, 01:13 PM) *
and has scoliosis

Hey hey hey - that's not fair... grr.gif
Lord Madhammer
Sep 11 2008, 12:20 PM
QUOTE (G.A.S.H. @ Sep 11 2008, 03:17 PM) *
QUOTE (Lord Madhammer @ Sep 11 2008, 01:13 PM) *
and has scoliosis

Hey hey hey - that's not fair... grr.gif

Life isn't fair.
Cool Hand Lube
Sep 11 2008, 12:25 PM
What's really not fair is how hard I laugh EVERY time I see Pete's sig pic...
Lord Madhammer
Sep 11 2008, 12:27 PM
QUOTE (Cool Hand Lube @ Sep 11 2008, 03:25 PM) *
What's really not fair is how hard I laugh EVERY time I see Pete's sig pic...

Nobody fucks with the Jesus.
G.A.S.H.
Sep 11 2008, 12:28 PM
QUOTE (Lord Madhammer @ Sep 11 2008, 01:20 PM) *
QUOTE (G.A.S.H. @ Sep 11 2008, 03:17 PM) *
QUOTE (Lord Madhammer @ Sep 11 2008, 01:13 PM) *
and has scoliosis

Hey hey hey - that's not fair... grr.gif

Life isn't fair.

Yeah, I know... grr.gif
Cool Hand Lube
Sep 11 2008, 12:33 PM
And FTR, Scoliosis is funny, and it's easy to make fun of people with it!
siburke939
Sep 11 2008, 12:35 PM
QUOTE (Hunter Rose @ Sep 11 2008, 06:13 PM) *
is probably the only person on the forum who has legitimately lost his virginity twice


if that's referring to what i think it is...

i've lost mine three times...
Cool Hand Lube
Sep 11 2008, 12:37 PM
QUOTE (siburke939 @ Sep 11 2008, 01:35 PM) *
QUOTE (Hunter Rose @ Sep 11 2008, 06:13 PM) *
is probably the only person on the forum who has legitimately lost his virginity twice


if that's referring to what i think it is...

i've lost mine three times...

Ummmm....

???
Lord Madhammer
Sep 11 2008, 12:38 PM
QUOTE (siburke939 @ Sep 11 2008, 03:35 PM) *
QUOTE (Hunter Rose @ Sep 11 2008, 06:13 PM) *
is probably the only person on the forum who has legitimately lost his virginity twice


if that's referring to what i think it is...

i've lost mine three times...

siburke939
Sep 11 2008, 12:40 PM
i was assuming...

1: male
2: female
3: don't ask (because i'm honestly not sure...)

MikePrime
Sep 11 2008, 12:41 PM
This girl should just become a hooker like in those Angel movies.
ROSEDOGGYDOG
Sep 11 2008, 12:43 PM
QUOTE (Cool Hand Lube @ Sep 11 2008, 12:44 PM) *
No kidding LM.

Have you ever heard the saying that "with a boy, you only have one d!ck to worry about, but with a girl, you have one million d!cks to worry about"?

I have 3 daughters BTW.


Have you and LM heard of "Custom - Hey Mister"? That song makes me happy that I don't have daughters (not that they're bad).

Because I'm not cool and don't know how to post youtube vids...

Hey Mister Video

QUOTE
[i]Hey Mister I really like your daughter,
I'd like to eat her like ice cream
maybe dip her in chocolate

Hey Mister on your way over
in your Volvo, suit, and tie
Well, be crawling in your bed soon
messing around, maybe getting high

It's not what ya did,
It's not what ya didn't
God gave her a perfect body
and now I'm all up in it.

It's not she's a tramp.
It's not she's not pure.
She just likes getting her fuck on,
and its good for that I'm sure

Hey Mister I really like your daughter.
When I'm horny like thirsty
She's a bottle of water.

Hey Mister how'd it get so bad
You raised her so well
and now she's calling me dad
in the back seat naked of a new Volkswagen
the perfect little gift for high school graduation.

It's not what ya did,
It's not what ya didn't
God gave her a perfect body
and now I'm all up in it.

It's not she's a tramp.
It's not she's not pure.
She just likes getting her fuck on,
and its good for that I'm sure

Nana na nana na,
Nana na nana na,
Nana na nana na,
ha hahaha ha ha haha

I eat all the food in your fridge
Call my friends around the world
Rack up your long distance do
Breakstands neutral drops
Wreck all your cars
Drink all the booze in your cheezy ass wet bar
Order stuff on your credit cards
Leave boogers in the skippy jar
Smoke your cigars
Answer the phone tell your boss you moved to mars
When you call in late from work tell your wife
You're at the" Titanium bars

It's not what ya did,
It's not what ya didn't
God gave her a perfect body
and now I'm all up in it.

It's not she's a tramp.
It's not she's not pure.
She just likes getting her fuck on,
and its good for that I'm sure

I can't lie I have to tell the truth
My commandments says I'm a total spoof
Your daughter's a freak
Your daughter's a pro
When i'm done with her
She'll do one of your bros

I hope I'll never have a daughter
I hope I'll never have a daughter
I hope I'll never have a daughter
I hope I'll never have a daughter

Nana na nana na,
Nana na nana na,
Nana na nana na,
Nana na nana naaaaaaaa!
Lord Madhammer
Sep 11 2008, 12:45 PM
I should totally sing that song to my father-in-law.
Cool Hand Lube
Sep 11 2008, 12:45 PM
All I know is that I will personally, and by hand, castrate the fukcer that deflowers my girls.
G.A.S.H.
Sep 11 2008, 12:49 PM
QUOTE (siburke939 @ Sep 11 2008, 01:40 PM) *
i was assuming...

1: male
2: female
3: donkey

Fixed biggrintf.gif
Lord Madhammer
Sep 11 2008, 12:50 PM
QUOTE (Cool Hand Lube @ Sep 11 2008, 03:45 PM) *
All I know is that I will personally, and by hand, castrate the fukcer that deflowers my girls.

leaving.gif
siburke939
Sep 11 2008, 01:00 PM
QUOTE (G.A.S.H. @ Sep 11 2008, 09:49 PM) *
QUOTE (siburke939 @ Sep 11 2008, 01:40 PM) *
i was assuming...

1: male
2: female
3: donkey

Fixed biggrintf.gif

animals count too?

OSHI---
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